Stop Watching Your Fears


Martin has experienced many times when he entered our coaching sessions scared about his current work & life problems,and left with regained self-confidence and energy. He came undecided what to do and walked off encouraged to take real actions. At the end I kept asking him "What have you learnt about yourself today?" And he replied: "I know now it's worth staying true to myself." Or: "I should solve problems by being in the now and neither somewhere in the future nor in the past". And the other day Martin said: "I can't harmonize everything I would like to, my role is about finding the harmony in disharmony."

I loved both his beautiful insights and his unbelievable mindset differences between arriving and leaving.

And once he asked me: "Milan, and what have YOU learnt on fighting with my fears?" Damn, he got me totally. I tried to satisfy him: "Ok Martin, well, there is a psychological theory dealing exactly with that plus some neuro-scientific studies describing what make your brain cope..." He interrupted me: "Sorry Milan, I would like you to tell me what you have found out from our sessions and not what you have studied about brains." Oh my Goodness, he is right - I'm kidding instead of answering.

"To be honest, Martin, your speechless beginnings were like you were watching a horror movie on TV and thus I tried to make you invite me to watch it with you. But, actually I do not like horrors at all. This is why you found my questions disruptive and inappropriate. But your brain was listening to your loud voice and the more you were describing your frightening scenes on TV the more were your fears fading away. And when I asked something like how dangerous could be the killer in the bush for you, I do remember you smiled at me with I see, it's only a stupid film, but very well made for me to feel scared."

I continued: "And that's the answer - I figured out I'm passionate about disturbing people by watching their own horrors." I almost felt guilty. "Yes, definitely you are, Milan, but I love the way you do it", was Martin's last insight.

And what about you? How do you fight against your fears? Alone or with someone's support?

And are there any uncertainties, fears or strange feelings you can't get off? Do not hesitate to write to me in Czech, English or in German.

Have a nice day and remember - no fear!